Breathing it in

We just recently returned from our week-long vacation, which I'll hopefully squeeze a post in about in the future.  Yesterday was the first day back at daycare for our three little girls, and it was a bit tough on all of them, after having mommy and daddy around 24/7 for 10 days.  Nugget especially had a difficult time transitioning back - after daycare pickup she just wanted to cuddle and snuggle with mama.  She went down for bedtime okay, but then woke around 11 pm and did.not. want to go back to sleep in her crib.  So I sat with her in the chair in her room, and snuggled and just breathed in her baby smell, as soon she won't be a baby anymore.  She would breathe deeply, but then here eyes would slide open, like she was checking if I was still there.  She finally gave in to sleep, but popped up the moment I laid her in her crib and cried.  Since I needed sleep, I took her into our  bed with me at this point.  She snuggled right in against my side and dozed off, although she still wasn't in a deep sleep for a while.  Was I sleeping?  No, but I savored that moment of snuggles and tried to commit the feel of it to memory.  He soft, still covered in baby peach fuzz head on my shoulder, her body curled against my side like it belonged there, her hand spread on my chest for assurance as she dozed.  She has gotten so big all of a sudden and her first birthday is only a few weeks away.  Once Nugget is ready for sleep, she doesn't want to cuddle (family trait), so once she pushed away from me and settled between the hubs and I on her stomach, I knew I could move her to her crib, but even though I'm tired this morning, I'm so glad I was able to sneak in the extra cuddles.  I am 99% sure she is my last baby (I can't say never yet), so I want to remember all these moments. 

Turning a corner?

I am furiously knocking on wood as I type this, but I think we may have turned a sleep corner.  Like Nugget has suddenly decided that she's cool with going to sleep and staying asleep, or putting herself back to sleep without needing to nurse.

If she has accomplished this without sleep training....yay.  I was worried I was getting to the point where my sanity couldn't take it anymore and we'd have to do some form of sleep training.

So, over the past few days, we have gone from 3-5 wake-ups a night to ONE last night.  One.  If I hadn't needed to stay up until almost midnight doing work I would feel so refreshed today, haha.  It also helps that SB and BW did not make a peep last night after a few nights in a row of terrible nightmares.

I'm giving some credit to her new sleep sack.  That thing is AH-MA-ZING.  I want one for me.  More on that in another post.

2016 began with a bang

Well, at least with a banging head, that is.  I woke up to the New Year with a terrible migraine.  We had to push off our family plans because I was unable to function for the first several hours of the New Year, likely a combination of not enough sleep and some yucky sinus virus.

We also rang in the New Year with three littles on antibiotics.  Nugget on a second course for the ear infections that won't quit, and SB and BW were both diagnosed with strep just after Christmas.  Thank you daycare.

I am on the mend, Nugget's last dose of antibiotics was this morning, and I am thankful that our illnesses our minor.

The hubs got me a fitbit for Christmas (I know I'm a bit late to the game). It has led to some interesting revelations. 

1) The sleep function is not entirely accurate.  I'm awake enough during portions of the night to have an awareness of when I'm awake (thank you, reverse-cycling infant), and the fitbit doesn't always register when I'm awake.  The other morning it credited me with an extra 40 minutes of sleep because it didn't register me waking, using the bathroom, putting my contacts in, and taking it off to set it on the counter while I showered.  I wish, fitbit, I wish.  With the inaccuracy, I average about 5.5 hours of interrupted sleep time a night, and I'd estimate that it's crediting me with an additional 30+ minutes of sleep that I'm not actually sleeping at night.  No wonder I'm tired.

2) It's a bit tricky if you are ambidextrous, as I don't have a true "dominant" hand - my hands share the load equally. - righty writes and does some stuff, but lefty does the majority of the other tasks - eating, brushing teeth, etc.  Even though I now have it coded as dominant on my left arm, I still have to remove it to brush my teeth or it counts every swipe as a step.

3) It is fascinating to see how many times I climb our stairs during a weekend.  Our two-story house plus my sleep-deprivation forgetfulness is certainly helping me burn calories.

4) I am terribly sedentary at work.  I am looking forward to when I can get more sleep so I can get more exercise in during the week. I can easily meet the 10K steps at home on weekends with cleaning and chasing after toddlers, but during the week I barely make half that.  Ugh.

I'm looking forward to 2016, although this year our babes will turn 3 and 1. What?  I'm aiming to write down goals this year - personal, work, household, and financial.  I want to make a bunch of things happen and I want to commit to them happening. More on that soon.

Bottle refusal

Nugget has taken me into new territory once again.  About a month ago, she started getting wishy-washy about taking her bottles.  Daycare was struggling to get her to take her whole bottle.  Daddy was struggling at home to get her to take her whole bottle.  I wasn't too worried because she was teething and was only missing out on a few ounces here and there. 

Now, a month later, the little stinker is pretty much outright refusing bottles.  Takes an ounce here or there.  I can nurse over lunch most days, and have been doing so, but she is effectively taking in anywhere from 2-4 ounces in addition to her nursing session.  If she is getting a full session, which I think she is, she is probably getting close to the 9 oz she would be expected to take in, so I'm not too worked up about it, but it makes life more interesting, as I'm supposed to have a work trip coming up, that I am seriously expecting I might have to bring my mom with me on so she can watch Nugget and I can nurse, since she won't take bottles.  She's not nursing at night to make up for the low volume at daycare, in fact has dropped to one night waking, and isn't eating much for solids yet, so I'm a bit baffled.  She could easily be taking in 5+ oz a nursing session though, so 5 feedings could still be 20-25 oz of milk, which isn't abnormal. SB and BW were every-three-hours during the day and 1-2 times a night nursers until close to a year, so this chubby baby who slows down her eating thing is all new to me.

Sickness strikes again

It's only December, and I already feel like we are living at the doctor's office this cold and flu season.

SB kicked things off with an ear infection.  This was like her third ear infection total, so it wasn't really on my radar.  10 days of antibiotics later...

Nugget had her six month appointment, and as I wrote earlier, had a double ear infection. Since she's been on antibiotics twice recently (ear infection, then respiratory infection) they tried a Z-pac this time - three days of antibiotics for her.

Then, BW had a couple accidents at daycare, and was suddenly waking up every morning with a wet pull-up.  I greatly appreciate daycare, because I would probably have been clueless had they not gently suggested that accidents like that can be indicative of a UTI.  So, after a doctor visit and urine sample (I'll write more about that later) BW was diagnosed with a bladder infection.  7 days of antibiotics for her.  Then, she has to have a repeat urine sample 3 days after finishing the antibiotics.  The following week, Nugget is scheduled for an ear recheck to make sure her ears are clear since she's had two ear infections in short order.

Sigh.  At least giving birth this year means we met our deductible long ago.

The last time...

I read an article or blog post a few years ago, can't remember which, about how we celebrate the "firsts" for kids, but how it's the "lasts" that are the most bittersweet.  With Nugget, I am finding how true that is.  I am 99% sure she is our last baby.  As the article stated, you often don't even know that you had the "last" until it is already gone.  Like the last time baby fits into a newborn outfit.  Or the last time you see that gummy smile before a tooth pokes through. 

I've sold our infant swing.  The rock n play is folded up, waiting for me to list it for sale.  The bouncy seat is stashed in our storage room, also waiting to be sold.  Nugget is closer to seven months than six.  She is sitting up on her own, army crawling across the floor, and loving eating solids.  I am oh-so-tired, but I know that there will be  time not very far off that I will not sleepily carry Nugget into our room in the early morning hours, before the sun is quite up, and snuggle and nurse her while we both half-doze.

This morning, BW picked out her clothes, then completely dressed herself, except for a little help with her socks.  With three under three, I've been working on self-dressing with SB and BW, but to have it suddenly a reality makes me realize how quickly they are growing up.  SB talked excitedly this morning about how when she gets bigger she will ride on the school bus, the biggest one.  Soon enough, little one. 

......

Then, we got to daycare and BW threw a fit because she wanted to go first (I'm not sure what or how she wanted to go first, as we were walking down the hall and she was in front of me) and then SB started crying as well, because why wouldn't you cry if you sister is crying? Still my little toddlers, after all :)

I'll take the gift of sleep for the holidays, please

My last post included Nugget's sudden penchant for middle of the night parties every 45 minutes to an hour or more.  This went on for a week.  Nugget was sleeping in the RnP for portions of the night so we could all get some sleep.  Nugget was spending a few hours attached to the boob so we could all get some sleep.  I have much greater sympathy for those moms who say their child won't sleep unless they are attached, because we did that for a couple hours two nights in a row.  I learned that I love baby snuggles, but bed-sharing is not for me.  The manner in which I have to lay to make sure I am not concerned about baby rolling in to me, and the shallow sleep pattern I am in since I am conscious of baby next to me is not restful at all.  Yawn.

Anyway, to keep this brief, Nugget had her 6-month check-up, and it turns out she had a double ear infection.  I felt like a terrible mom, but aside from some differences in her normal behavior that really only clued me in after the fact (the waking all the time thing, and being a booger about taking bottles at daycare) she was absolutely unchanged.  She was her same smiley, cooing self, and even her night wakings she was cooing and squealing like she just wanted to be awake for the heck of it. No fever, no tugging on ears, nothing.  So, good to know that the kid doesn't show signs of being sick like I would expect.

It's taken a course of antibiotics and a few days, but Nugget is finally, after almost 2 weeks, starting to sleep some longer stretches again.  Every time I get her to sleep and lay her down, I pray she will sleep at least 2 hours.  Last night she slept from 8-10, and 10-3.  I'll take it.

In other news, she is at the weight limit, and, with rolling and sitting unassisted and being almost able to pull herself fully sitting, developmental limit, for the RnP.  It needs to go.  However, it's so nice to have the incline sleep option if necessary.  Sigh.

Week 26

I've had a rudimentary understanding of the Wonder Weeks since SB and BW were little, but I haven't done heavy reading into it.  It makes sense that babies have developmental leaps; but I don't know that I need to have specific instruction to "help" my baby through the leap. 

I vaguely recalled that one was around the six-month mark, so when Nugget slept like poo a few nights ago, and decided that the middle of the night was a great time to have a party last night, I decided to look it up.  Closest leap? 26 weeks.  Nugget's age?  26 weeks, 1 day.  Week 26 is supposed to be about relationships.  Baby realizes that things have differing distances from baby.  Which explains why Nugget thought she should wake up and nurse every 1-2 hours a few nights ago.  Must have mommy close.  Also explains while she was squealing and cooing to herself in her crib the next night and I went to peek in at her (hoping she would soothe herself to sleep) she had her paci outstretched and was turning it slowly too and fro, studying it carefully.

She's also started using rolling as a mode of transportation, like she just realized there is a purpose and benefit to being able to roll over, and it's not just an accident or novelty.  She doesn't complain about being put on her tummy anymore because she knows she can change it if she wants to.  She also is really starting to love interacting with SB and BW.  She smiles at them and "talks" to them, and they can usually distract her if she is starting to get fussy and I need a minute or two to finish something up.  Although SB and BW are technically our "middle" children, I have a feeling Nugget will be our mediator.  She is very calm most of the time, although she has her moments.  I can't wait to keep watching them grow up together. 

Enjoying summer 2.0

As I write this, I am watching two ponytails bob around the back yard picking clover (we need to spray for weeds and fertilize our lawn, clearly).  It's a rare moment when Nugget is napping so the girls are engaging in "unstructured free play," which gives me a free moment to pull out the laptop on the deck.  I read an article on facebook yesterday about how they are finding that unstructured outdoor play is key for children to get to use their imagination and assist in developing their brain, etc etc.  I think this is one of the great benefits to having twins for your first pregnancy - they have an instant playmate.  They are starting to engage in more pretend play and I enjoy observing from a distance.

This is definitely a benefit to being home on maternity leave and having SB and BW home as well.  I don't feel guilty or like I'm giving up some of our precious non-work time that I get with them to let them run around and explore on their own.  While I still know that being a stay at home mom isn't the best choice for me or my family, I would love to work part time if that was an option.  I suppose it would be with some lifestyle changes, but the availability of part-time jobs in my field where we are located is almost nil.  So, I'll savor what is likely my last maternity leave, which is already passing by much to fast.

Reflections on three under three - a few weeks in

Since a few weeks have passed since my last post, I thought I'd do an update.  We've switched SB and BW to daycare just two days a week for the remainder of my maternity leave.  Things are still going fairly well, although we've decided we need to focus a bit more on getting SB and BW more one-on-one attention if possible.  SB in particular seems to be struggling a bit to gain attention from the hubs and I, even if it is negative attention.  Although I know defiance and independence is par for the course with her age, I think her defiance is connected more with wanting more attention.  She is still, all in all, a great kid, so I try to remind myself to be patient and work through these difficulties.  True one-on-one attention is difficult, especially for me, because Nugget is still so new, but hopefully an individual overnight with grandma will give both SB and BW some special time with me and the hubs.

I am still enjoying the ease of one baby versus two babies.  I feel like I am truly learning Nugget in a way I wasn't able to do with SB and BW when they were new.  I love being able to pop her in the Moby and still be mobile and get out with SB and BW.  She still is a relatively easy baby and is napping in her crib as I type this - a milestone that was really difficult to accomplish with SB and BW.  I think things will get more difficult as she gets past the newborn stage and is more alert and needs more stimulation

I am also really enjoying not having the stress of work hanging over my head all the time.  I feel like I can participate more in my household in the evenings, help clean up, not worry about SB and BW going to bed so I can get some work done.  I am less stressed and feel like I am able to more fully participate in my family.  I'm not looking forward to returning to work and shouldering that workload again.

Initial reflections on 3 under 3...

As I type this, Nugget is snoozing on the bed next to me.  At just over a week old, we're still figuring some stuff out, but in general, life is good.  We may still be in the honeymoon phase, but both the hubs and I have confessed that things are going easier than we expected.  Which, of course, has probably jinxed us.

To start, Nugget has been a champion at breastfeeding.  She latched and even swallowed within the first hour after birth.  She dropped down to 8 lbs (from 8 lbs 7 oz) at discharge, and five days later had gained 11 oz.  Since it took BW 3 weeks to get back to birth weight, this gain is awesome.  No supplementing.  No pumping (although I did pump a few times when my milk first came in to relieve some engorgement, I was able to just pop that in the freezer right away).  We put the bottle drying rack back in the pantry, because we haven't had to wash pump parts regularly. Although I've felt I'm in unfamiliar territory learning how to BF a singleton, overall things are going very well.

Nursing one baby instead of two is quicker.  I have time to eat, nap, pick up, throw a load of laundry in.  I don't have to pick and choose and sometimes not accomplish any of them. I went to the store today by myself.  Things will be a bit more hectic once SB and BW are only going to daycare part-time for the remainder of my maternity leave, but the difference in caring for one newborn instead of two is very noticeable.

SB and BW love her.  They look for her in the morning; they look forward to seeing her after daycare.  Although we had a few days of transition after grandma went home and we settled in with Nugget when SB and BW were moody, cranky, and uncooperative, they are adjusting well.  We have to be very vigilant about Nugget, as SB and BW get quite excited and bounce around and there are sometimes limbs flying everywhere.