After much thought, the hubs and I made the decision to rehome our pets. I feel quite terrible about it., but I know in my heart it is the best thing for them and for us. I have remained fairly quiet about our decision, because I have been very critical of people who get rid of pets after they have kids, but this is now the reason for our decision, and, as someone who grew up with cats and dogs around throughout my childhood, I am very sad that my kids will not have that in the immediate future.
The hubs had a cat before we met, which he got for DSD. A few months after the hubs and I started dating, I got a dog. Although I grew up with pets and had roommates that had pets, this was my first pet. I researched for a long time and settled on a particular dog breed - a weimaraner. Then I spent several months working with a few rescue organizations to find the appropriate dog for me, and the hubs (then boyfriend) traveled with me to a different state to pick up the dog.
Cat is high maintenance. He was born on a farm, and still has some farm cat in him. He loves to go outside, demands to go outside, but expects to be let back inside when he desires, even if it is 4 am. He catches rodents, is highly susceptible to UTIs (as most male cats are) and has a penchant for peeing in bathroom sinks for some reason. He can open lever handle doors, but also can just repeatedly pull and release the lever handle to make the optimum level of annoyance noise in the middle of the night. He knocks over water glasses and shreds the weather stripping on doors, even though he is declawed. Although I like cats, I like them less as I get older, and I have had zero attachment to this Cat, and DSD and the hubs are not climbing over each other to clean up after Cat, so the litter box and his hair invade our house. Ick.
Dog is also high maintenance, which I knew going in. He is a breed that is highly prone to separation anxiety, and he is no exception. He is also highly intelligent and intuitive and very attention seeking. He has also grown protective as he has gotten older, particularly of me, and has lunged at people that he perceives to be a threat to me. We our twins were born, he became very protective of them as well, and would be very nervous is anyone other than immediate family were holding them, and would often try to position himself between guests and the babies. I was very happy he was so accepting of our babies.
However, all that changed when they became mobile. Suddenly, although still protective of them, he hated them. He didn't want them anywhere near him. He paced and growled and and would try to hide from them. We worked for some time on helping him be more comfortable with them. We let them feed him treats and encouraged him to relax and let them pet him. We did not allow the twins to bother him - they weren't allowed to pet him or touch him or even go in his general direction if he was in any way showing signs of agitation. We pretty much prevented any contact unless he was getting treats from them. Nothing worked. He still was very unsettled and unhappy whenever they were awake, essentially. We were very worried that sooner or later his agitation would turn into aggression. It didn't help that SB and BW love him, wanted to play with him, pet him, feed him. They were just as excited to give him treats as he was to receive them. Finally, after a lot of hard thinking, we decided that this type of environment was not fair to Dog, and we couldn't take any risk that he would have to resort to aggression out of frustration with the babies. For a while I hoped that as they got older and he got older, things would improve. But then I saw pictures of my friends and their toddlers, using their dogs as pillows, or sitting on top of them, and realized that things probably weren't going to improve. He is just not a dog that is comfortable with small children.
We were still in limbo a bit, but then the hubs happened to be talking to a co-worker. Her husband wanted a dog. She was willing to get a dog if it was a rescue dog of this particular breed. They weren't planning on having children. We met them. They came over to meet Dog, who loved them, and they loved him. We were honest about Dog's faults and his many great qualities. They were perfect for Dog. Dog went to live with them a few weeks ago, and they send us updates. A part of me still feels like I failed Dog, because I didn't keep him, I didn't keep my promise to give him a forever home. But another part of me feels like I had to do this so Dog wasn't miserable. Being in our home and being subject to constant agitation and nervousness was not fair to him, and he loves his new owners. They live close enough that he could visit if we wanted him to.
I feel a bit more guilty about Cat - but I also made the deal with hubs that if Dog goes, Cat goes. However, I also said that I wasn't going to dump Cat at a humane society or anything like that - we would wait for the right opportunity and home that genuinely wanted a cat, and Cat in particular. Then, out of the blue, my MIL called. She wanted Cat. Her house would be perfect for Cat, as it backs up to woods and he could explore outside to his heart's content. We could still visit and see Cat and get updates on how he is doing. Cat is still living at our house, but he will probably soon be moving to MILs house. Newsflash - I won't miss him. But he will have a lovely woman who will love his snuggles and won't mind his fluff, which is more fair to him than our house.
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